I don’t always drink milk, but when I do… Wait! Who am I kidding? I always drink milk.

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baby boy max, sits on a BoppyNewbornLounger wearing a white onesie
The Most Interesting Man in The World [Wikipedia]

Sam, What are your thoughts on tonight’s feeding?

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baby boy sam, wearing a monkey-patterned outfit is being interviewed. There is a Sony mini-dic player with a stereo microphone in front of him. The photo is a collage of 4 images.

TDS: Sam, What are your thoughts on tonight’s feeding?

Sam: I tried to focus on doing what I do well—eating and getting bigger every day.

TDS: Tell me about your feeding strategy.

Sam: I like to go out there, settle in, and give it 110% every time I get the chance to eat. I find that burping is an under-appreciated part of the feed. Rhythm, balance, position, core strength: it’s something you have to work at every day. Without it, I start to cry. Plus, keep the milk organic, GMO-free. No flax-seed oil, if you know what I mean.

TDS: You seem to prefer feeding left handed but you occasionally feed right.

Sam: I’m up for whatever the coach needs me to do. I just try to keep my eye on the bottle. Sometimes, especially when there’s rocking, the nipple moves unpredictably, but if you pay attention to the bottle, it all works out. I also try not to think about how much is left, but definitely, toward the end of the feed, you have to just dig in and get the job done; try not to strand any milk in the bottle, and put more calories on the board.

TDS: Your brother is having a good year. I see he’s finished a lot if bottles lately.

Sam: That’s right. Huge respect for Max. But I can only focus on my own feeding; and certain high-contrast objects.

TDS: Do you have any special rituals before a feeding?

Sam: They say the best feeders are also the best nappers, so I try to get some rest. There’s definitely room for improvement there. Maybe I’ll spend some time in the swing. I also chew pacifiers between feedings.

TDS: Any role models?

Sam: It took me a lot of years to get to the big game. I really look up to my mom and dad and the coaching staff—they basically tower above me. And they give me huge support, plus diaper changes, which is key. I’m just happy to have the chance to eat.

TDS: Any advice for the younger players out there?

Sam: Drink your milk.